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Wednesday, August 30, 2006
Give up...
Give up... I totally give up le... I put my both hands up with white flags, surrender... Surrender everything to her... I give up my friendship wif her, I totally wanna give up le... In fact, I will give up... It's a hard life for me... I'm tired... Very tired... Sick and tired... Hiaz...

I did all I can, jus to save tis friendship. In the end, I made myself sadder. I tried to talk to u, tried to call u to talk abt our problem. But wat u reply me made me fall down again and again. Is it really tat u are so heartless? Or is it tat u don wanna care for our friendship anymore? I asked myself, "Don u feel it's a pity for both of us? Don u feel anything as we were like tat? Don u cherish our times together?

I really don noe wat u are thinking, and how u feel... I asked u tis question, but u remained silence... Is tis wat u really wan? U feel it's happy to be like tat? I don noe... Don noe wat's ur answer... But frankly speaking, I don feel tis way... I wan us to go back to the past, but I hav no strength to do tat... I tried my best, yet u are jus going away further from me. Everytime I took 1 step forward, u took 2 steps backward.

I hav no energy le... I feel really tired... Tired... Jus wanna sleep and sleep... Jus don wanna wake up from my sleep... I wanna feel happy, therefore, I wun let u hurt me anymore... I wun treat u as before, I wun do anymore things jus to save tis friendship. Coz u wun treasure,, u wun appreciate, u wun reply me, u wun wan to do anything wif me anymore... I give up...








~ { 2:02:00 PM }
*Hoping for the little hope*;

Saturday, August 19, 2006
Failure...
Failure... Failure... Haiz... Don noe why she's like tat... Why muz she treat her friends like tat? Haiz... Disappointment... I never noe tat u are like tat, I never noe tat ur friends are like tat. Haiz...

Friday went for CO, den I taught my strings de. Hmmm... Quite good norx, at least can complete the whole song. Den debrief le, talk at the sec4 farewell party de. After tat, went to the canteen to talk and settled problem.

First case was my strings de. Haiz... Ppl made ppl cry, den hav to talk to them. After tat second case was her and her friends. Tat one made me even sadder... It's bcos of sth, den hav to be their so-called 'mediator'. I promised I will help them settle problems de, but in the end solved le also no use. Haiz...

I read the letters they write for her, and I was terribly shocked tat she said all those things to them, which were lies. I couldn't believe it norx. Hiaz... They asked me questions and I tried to answer them, some I don even noe how to answer, no face to say. Haiz... We talk till nearly 7, but still haven solve. Den went to bus stop to talk. I'm disappointed in her norx, why muz be like tat?

We took bus and went to cwp, den talk at the bus interchange. I advice to them, but don noe they will listen ma. Haiz... Maybe they are not me, den thinkings not the same ba. Or maybe I'm not them, so cannot figure out their feelings. But I'm there to help them, help them on their friendship. Cos I don wan them to be like be, seriously speaking norx.

Forgive and forget is one of the best solutions. I don noe u all can ma, but time can heal... Am I right? Time is the best doctor, and it's true, it's the fact ba... Don't u think so? I experienced tis before and I noe tat time definately can heal. It's jus whether u all wan it ma. Hmmm... Up to u all to decide whether u wan the time to be longer or to be shorter.

Anyway, I can't decide for u all cos I'm not u all, den don noe ur feelings. So decide urself ba, it's ur choice how u wanna solve tis. If she did tis again, don care abt her le. (if u all wan) Jus hope tat ur friendship wif her will be improved, and be happy too...




~ { 6:08:00 PM }
*Hoping for the little hope*;

Sunday, August 13, 2006
O'level Chinese results
Hmmm... Should I be happy ma? I got my o'level chinese result on friday... I'm was so scared and nervous, everyone was nervous too... After recess, we don hav assembly, so we went back to class. Me and Miao hui went to change back to sch uni. Den went back to class was like everyone was there le, except the 2 of us. Hehez...

We settle down and waiting for the excited moment. Everyone was like very nervous, me too... Den mr seow released the result le. I was the thid for chinese de. Den he say, "bao qi, 2, distinction." Yeah... I got an A2 for my chinese. I was quite happy at first de, coz I thought I hav got a B3. But later, I heard many A1, distinctions. Den it was like echo like tat. Den I began to be sadder and sadder. Haiz...

Why almost everyone can get an A1, I can't? Den anna cried also, she the same case as me. She also got A2 and distinction, same same. Haiz... I was upset, my friends got A1, I got A2. I didn't do well in my paper, but others do well. Haiz... Nvm la. At least got an A2, better than nth, hor? Yeha... Muz hav positive thinking de. Hehez...

Den english oral tat day. I was the forth one. So scared... Den went up le, I hav 10 mins. I looked at the thing and stared... So difficult de, OMG... But still prepare for my oral. Den went up to the examiners, they looked so strict. I said 'good afternoon' to them, but they didn't smile or anything. Jus looked at me. Den they asked the questions I don noe how to answer. Jus answer anyhow. Sobz... Sobz... Gonna die liao... Haiz... Don noe wat the result will be. Jus pray hard ba.












~ { 11:05:00 AM }
*Hoping for the little hope*;

Friday, August 04, 2006
Watch Mia Musica
Wed after sch, went to watch mia musica. But we released earlier, actually is 4.10 den release de. Den Mr chew had to go off early, had physics practical earlier. Hehez... Den went to find teacher wif wan er. After tat Mr chew say cannot watch the dvd, so was quite sad. Den wan er left off le, me went to return keys den go find lay khean. Went up to music studio together. We jus go CO see see norx.

Ppl say can watch the video le, so happy. Hehez... Went down to AvA den sit down. They play the video le, den i ask guang kang to stop firdt, coz many ppl haven come yet. He stopped den chen ying scold him why he stop, coz hav to restart again. Guang Kang say "da jie bigger, so muz listen". Den wat 'she' say made me mad. 'She' said to chen ying, "Ni bei bie ren bian xia qu le, ni chairman lei." So angry wif 'her' words, I didn't mean ath norx, jus want everyone to see ma. Den she say like tat. Haiz...

Watch video den bring alot of memories. Miss the time at VCH, Mia Musica. Den watch the video, tears keep rolling in my eyes, but didn't flow out coz I hold on. But as we watch longer, more and more tears keep rolling here and there in my eyes. Cannot take it, jiu let it roll down. Few tears nia, den use tissue wipe, luckily nobody see it. Hehez...

Still hav memories inside my heart, CO muz jia you!!! Muz get at least a silver back in nxt year's syf. Will support u all all the way... :)








~ { 1:34:00 PM }
*Hoping for the little hope*;